#BringJasonHome · Being A Mom · Health & Wellness · Love & Marriage · Mental Health · Mompreneur · Ovarian Cancer · Religion & Spirituality · Veteran Affairs

Music, poetry, gratitude and hell…

I wrote this the other day, and it pretty much sums up the point I want to make…

Mic drop.

I can end this post now.

Just kidding…

Continue reading “Music, poetry, gratitude and hell…”

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Being A Mom

My Daughter Thinks She’s a YouTuber

This is an old gem from Jan. 8, 2016 — when my daughter was only 4. Lol! I uploaded it but I guess I never published it. Haha! I hope you find it as entertaining as I still do. Hahahahahaha! So cute…. ♥ ♥ ♥

PS — The baby in the toilet is part of a Ray William Johnson best of compilation that I was watching as she was making this video. He throws a baby doll into a toilet?? I can’t remember why… it was a long time ago. LOL!

#BringJasonHome · Love & Marriage · Mental Health · Veteran Affairs

OK. So, I’m a little… er… a lot bitter…

When I was in my late teens, there was a karaoke bar that I used to go to with my friends.

There was always this middle-aged guy who would be drunk way too early, and he would get up on stage and sing Wildflower by Skylark to me.

I never knew his name. He never asked me my name. We weren’t attracted to each other or anything. We never talked. But, right before I left, every time I went there, he would get up and sing me this song.

It was flattering and it also cracked me up.

After everything that’s happened recently, the song has come back to haunt me. There’s one particular line that’s on constant loop in my head.

The way she’s always paying for a debt she never owes.

Marrying young Continue reading “OK. So, I’m a little… er… a lot bitter…”

Health & Wellness · Mental Health · Veteran Affairs

A veteran’s wife deserves respect, too!

tackle it

It’s been almost 2 months since I’ve posted anything meaningful.

A lot of it has to do with feeling detached and emotionally numb.

That’s not to say I don’t feel anything. I cycle through extreme joy, extreme sorrow and then extreme NOTHINGNESS.

Sometimes, I think that I feel so much that there’s a switch that my brain turns off for me. My physical body just isn’t allowing things to set in completely.

It’s very Vampire Diaries.

Continue reading “A veteran’s wife deserves respect, too!”

Mental Health · Religion & Spirituality

#GirlOnFire

Spirit of Marilyn callin’ me, audibly
Bawlin’ she, said that she would never leave
Continued to torture me
Telling me to come with her
Underneath my comforter
And she brought a gun with her
Pills and some rum with her
Tip me on the balcony
Telling me to jump with her
Yeah I’m in the ghost but I ain’t doing stunts with her
I ain’t tryna be that
Haters wanna see that
But I got ’em aggy
‘Cause I win the gold like Gabby Continue reading “#GirlOnFire”

#BringJasonHome · Health & Wellness · Love & Marriage · Mental Health · Religion & Spirituality

Soul searching…

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There’s something very awkward about having a public persona.

We live in a world where people Google you after you first meet. They make assumptions about you and know tidbits about your life that are most likely, way out of context.

The publicity was necessary. I wanted to make sure Jason didn’t go to prison.

There’s a lot of things that can’t be put on the record or the judge won’t allow it to be on the record. It was important to me that our story be told so Jason could get the help he needed.

I advocated so hard and so fiercely that it took a lot from me. Continue reading “Soul searching…”

#BringJasonHome · Mental Health

UPDATE: Once a soldier, always a soldier…

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Update from GoFundMe: Hi everyone!! I know it’s been a few weeks since I’ve posted an update. I didn’t feel up to sharing every single thought or event over the past month or so. (I know, what a surprise.) I thought I’d post an update sometime over the past few days but it was Memorial Day weekend and it didn’t seem appropriate since it’s a solemn celebration in honour of those who paid the ultimate price for us.

Anyway, a few weeks ago, Jason was moved up to Level 2 (see previous update). This meant he could FINALLY see the kids. But because of Mother’s Day and staff shortage, he wasn’t able to see the kids until last weekend. It was the first time Charles, Liberty and Alanna had seen him in 3 months.

I also spent a few hours with him during visitation on Saturday and for the first time, Jason and I had a serious talk about the future. It was a really difficult conversation.

He kept talking about re-enlisting after he got out of there. I know it’s not about me but it was very hard to listen to. He kept talking about wanting to go back to the army. Wanting to do more. Wanting to give more. That he had so much more to offer. He wanted to be medically fit enough to go back. I just didn’t really know what to say. Continue reading “UPDATE: Once a soldier, always a soldier…”